What happens when women say yes to God.....

I don't know how many of you know this, but for the past 3 months I have been trying to lose weight. I have given myself over to counting the dreaded calories keeping them to 1222 which was what my app said to do and exercising. I have chosen biking to be my favored form of exercising.

I enjoy biking. I really do.

My Dad gave me his old bike, and I have put it to good use. We were given a child carrier and Emma and I have ridden. Miles. Thankfully she likes it. ;)

I have been so very frustrated that all this working out just didn't seem to be helping. After a conversation I overhead and totally butted in on at church, I was told to increase my calories by about 500 and add a lot of protein. She thought I wasn't eating enough.

So I did. I increased my calories and added protein.

I am thankful for that lady. Because I no longer feel like I am going to stab somebody in the eye with a fork out of hunger anymore. I feel more satisfied, and feel like I can make it now between snacks and meals.

The 1st 2 months I admit I would cheat here and there. But I thought ......goodness, just giving up soda and ice cream and incorporating exercise into my day should be enough to kick start some weight loss.

I have lost a total of 5 pounds.

This past month, I was on it. I tried my ever living best. I even started having daily dates with Jillian Michaels.  But the pounds did NOT come off. In fact not a single ounce had come off. I know what some of you are thinking....well muscle weighs more then fat....blah blah blah....my clothes still fit the same and I was done with the whole blasted thing. Done I tell yah.....

This past Friday was my official weigh in day for myself. I walked away almost in tears. I felt like I have been killing myself.....for what?? To not lose anything?? To still be stuck at the same size as I was when I would eat anything I wanted. To me it seemed hopeless.

I am so thankful that I have a God who listens to his children....and not only listens....but then does something that only he can do.

You see.....after JP fixed our laptop, I found this picture online and I put it as the backdrop to my laptop. I immediately fell in love with the bike. I loved the color, I loved the little basket on it.

It was just beautiful to me.

The women in our church just finished a bible study called What happens when Women say yes to God by Lysa Terkeurst

Good study.

In one of the beginning weeks, one of my friends Jennifer in my small group said that she felt that God was prompting her to give away her bike. Her new bike. Her treasured bike that she had purchased for herself because she loved it. She loved the way she felt when she rode it.

But she felt the gentle tugging on her soul that God was telling her to give it away.

This past week in our study, Lysa really stressed that if you felt God was telling you to do something then to take the steps to do it.

So on Friday, Jennifer, after being reminded to give her bike away, took pictures of it and posted it on facebook. And said...hey, I'm giving this bike away, anyone want it?

Friday night, I jumped on facebook real quick while I was running errands and saw her post. I said...hey sure I'll take the bike....not really thinking anymore of it.

Later that night after I got home, I checked facebook and I had a message from Jennifer saying that I wanted the bike it was mine. We made plans for me to come pick it up the next morning.

I shut my internet down and I saw the background of my laptop.... and low and behold I saw this teal bike staring at me. And I thought....no way......NO WAY!!!!

Because you see......

This is the bike that I was given......A most beautiful teal bike. With not only a beautiful basket, but also a cup holder on it.....just because God could.

This story might not impress anyone else in the world. And that is fine with me. But it not only impresses me....it stopped me in my tracks. I was floored. Only my God could have done that.

And I heard gently in my soul My child do not give up..... to continue on this slow process of losing weight.

 

Today, I pray for my friend Jennifer......that God richly blesses her. I pray that God opens up the floodgates of heaven and shows her something only He can do. She allowed God to use her to not only bless me but encourage me. She is a woman that says YES to God. I want to be like that.

 

So now my friends....I am off to ride my God-bike.

El Shaddai

In my bible study, we are talking about promised land living, and what it means. One of the signs of promised land living is expecting miracles.

I think I struggle with this. You see,  I see the miracles in the Bible and I wonder why these great and mighty miracles don't happen today..... to me or the people around me. Maybe they do and I am not aware of them because people don't talk about them.

This has been something on my mind for quite some time now. Expecting miracles.

To be one in a million, to see God working and moving in my life, yes.....I want that. I want that with my whole heart.

To expect miracles.

Well....yes. I expect miracles. But maybe I am expecting the wrong thing. I'm not talking about...... that God wouldn't work. Because I know He does. But my way is not God's way. His idea of a miracle may not be mine.

You see, this week, I have been expecting a miracle. I have been expecting God to take care of something. Something I don't really want to get into the details of. But Jeremy and I have been anxiously awaiting to see God move....in a big huge way. We wanted to see something that only God could do.  And as we would tick the days off the week, we kept waiting. And the miracle never came.

Well....in the way I thought it would.

My ways are not God's ways. I am not God. And He doesn't always choose to tie things up in a pretty box with a pretty ribbon and hand it to us.

No, this week, God did not do the miracle I was expecting.

But then God.

Did.

When the Israelites were walking to Canaan. Moses had died and Joshua was now their leader, they had to cross the Jordan river. At that point the Jordan was swollen. At flood stage, the river was 50 times wider then normal. I can't even imagine how big it was. I can't even imagine how raging the waters were sweeping by them. 50 times wider then normal.

This week, yes, this week has been tough. It has been "tougher then normal." Maybe not 50 times more, but the burden has been deeper, heavier then normal.

I have spent time on my knees, face down in front of my God. And everyday, I have gotten up. Expecting. Anxiously awaiting to see His miracle. I didn't know what it was or how it would come. But I HAD to have faith to see the unseeable.

A prayer of my heart has been that God would take my box, that box of who I thought He is, who I have been taught He is, the box that we put our past experiences with God in, that box where we throw our disappointments with God into and  turn it upside down and shake it out. God is not a God of the Sunday morning pew who so many many good bible believing Christians think He is. My God is not dead, He lives and He moves and He shows Himself to those who earnestly seek Him.

No, God was not silent this week. He had a horn shouting in my ear and in my heart. And I am so grateful. It came by means of a sermon online. (My friend Jenn told us about it in our small group at Bible Study. It has touched her heart last week and she wanted to share.) TD Jakes preaches a sermon called Save the Scraps. Amazing. I sat at my kitchen table this week drinking it in. Eating the Bread of Life. Meat. That my hungry soul has been craving.

Listen to the sermon if you have a little while. It is in 3 parts. I can't find it in 1 whole segment.

Save the Scraps part 1

Save the scraps part 2

Save the scraps Part 3

If you listen to the sermon, the following might be a little more clear.

What I learned, what I came away with (besides my 6 pages of notes) was the miracle is in the breaking. The sermon was based on the 2 fish and 5 loaves. The miracle of that day didn't happen until Jesus broke the bread. Breaking had to occur before the miracle could happen. And each time the breaking came, the miracle became more and more.

I sat there and my God was breaking my will. Breaking my control. Breaking my expectations. Breaking my mold of who I thought God was.

Breaking me.

Miracles always begin in recognition of what you have. If you don't recognize what you have you can never multiply what you do not recognize.

God blessed something that wasn't enough. Until you can be thankful something that is not enough, you can't be thankful for the more then enough.

El Shaddai. More then enough.

Why would a God whos' name means more then enough, stop at enough? Why would David say, my cup runneth over? When God says I will pour out a blessing, I am not limited by your capacity to receive what I have. I intend for you to have overflow so that your children and your childrens children.....will have enough.

When the Israelites crossed that raging, swollen river. God had stopped the water from the north. So the Israelites walked across Jordan on dry ground.

He stopped the waters from flowing.

No, the miracle isn't what I thought it would be. The miracle for us is that He stopped the raging waters from flowing this week.

The Miracle has been something better. Something only God could do. Something only God could show me. I am so glad that He gave me ears to hear from Him.

The Miracle has been God turning the not enough into more then enough.

The miracle has been in saving the scraps.

The miracle has been in calming his child.

In me knowing El Shaddai.

Scraps. I will save the scraps.

This Mountain

I am walking through a kinda difficult time in my life. God is moving and doing things in my life in which I don't fully understand. I am fine with that. I know that God's ways are not my ways.

I am in the middle of this Bible Study. And I tell you it is challenging me in ways that I couldn't even really imagine. My honest prayer is that God really will change my life. I desire to be 1 in a million.

You see, I am now, in the middle of the wilderness. I know that God has led me here for a reason. The children of Israel didn't just happen upon the wilderness, God led them there for there good. He led them there because He knew they couldn't face war with the Philistines. God led them through the wilderness to teach them who He is and what he is capable of doing. They didn't have to make the journey last 40 years. That was there choice BC they disobeyed God.

I do not want to be like the Israelites I do not want to wander aimlessly for 40 years through this place. God has led me to this place in my life. He will speak kindly to me (Hosea 2:14) and he will gently lead me through it. I pray that I will not fail my tests as He brings them to me.

Today's study was intense. It was about Mt. Sinai. the Mountain of God. The place where God revealed himself to Moses. Twice. The place where God promised Moses that He would lead his people to.

Mt. Sinai was the furthest point south in the journey to the land of Canaan. The furthest point away from the land flowing with milk and honey.

The place where they were furthest away from their goal was where God showed himself.

I look at our life. And we seem to be so far from.....where we envisioned ourselves, from our hopes and dreams. And I know sometimes we wonder if it will always be like this. Will we always struggle though everything? Can things never go "easy" for us.

It seems to me that we are so very far from that place....that place of comfort, or "being able to breath easier" I surely know that things could get worse. I know that others have it worse.

Mt. Sinai was south. Canaan was far to the north. At the mountain of God, the Israelites were far from the place they desired. No milk or honey was in sight. But while the Hebrews longed for a land of external blessing and abundance, God called them to stop at Sinai. There they would discover internal blessing and an abundance that they didn't realize they needed. At Sinai they obtained intimacy and fellowship with the Lover of their souls, a gift far more precious and lasting then Canaan's milk and honey. I believe every wilderness journey leads to a Sinai experience. The place that seems distant from your desired destination provides fertile soil for God to reveal Himself to you.

You see, yes, I would love to be in my "Canaan," that place where we can breath a little bit better. But more then that, I truly desire to know my God. I desire to hear from God daily, and to walk in his footsteps. I desire to see Him work in ways I can't even imagine. I want him to transform my life. OuR LiVeS.

Maybe that is why God has us here. I don't know if I would have understood that. To want God more then we want that....... 1 thing in our life. What is that 1 thing that you long for?? A husband? A new house? A baby? A new job?

Seek for God more then you seek for that. That is what God wants.

Now if you are like me, when hard things happen in your life, you want to get through them as fast as possible. This wilderness that I am in hasn't been fun. It has been emotionally exhausting. It has been trying, it is a path of walking by faith and not by sight. For if I walked by sight, I would be a sinking ship. No....I want to learn whatever lesson I am supposed to learn and then hightail it out of this wilderness.

But what did the Israelites do when they came to the Mountain of God? Exodus 19:2 says that they camped there!!!! They put up their tent and camped out in front of the Mountain.

I don't know what it means to camp out in this wilderness of my life. Moses knew that he was leading the people of God to Holy ground. But on the chance that I am sitting in front of a Mountain of God. Holy Ground. I will pitch my tent and camp out so I can meet with God.

Friend, camp at this mountain with a glad heart. Despite the difficulty of the journey and with all your questions in tow, fully engaged in this season of God's chosen journey for you. Don't leave your bags packed in hopes God will quickly move you to Canaan. Don't miss out on what He wants to do "this very day" Settle in and turn your eyes to the mountain. The Lord wants to reveal Himself to you in a way that will change your life forever.

Wow.

So my prayer today, is to camp at the Mountain of God. I have so many questions. So many. But I pray that I am fully engaged in this wilderness journey that He has me on. I do not want to miss God working in the little details of my life. My eyes are turned to the Mountain.

May today be the day that I see the God that brought me out of Egypt. Lord, change my life and the life of my family. I pray that I see God supernaturally work in my life.

I love this song. Maddie and I were singing to it the other day.

*****The words written in italics were copied from my study book*****

If you get the chance, I highly recommend this study. It might just change your life.

Made to Crave

I will admit it...... I have not been good today. I think for dinner I will just need to stick with a glass of ice water with lemon. Well...maybe not the lemon. :( That might be to many calories. I am trying. Truly I am. I worked out this afternoon. Like crazy mad worked out. 50 min on the elliptical. I was shooting for 60 min. Trying to burn off some of these insane calories I have eaten. Like I said....I was shooting for 60 min....... until my elliptical broke. The plastic piece in the middle cracked right down the middle. I could cry. Really I could. Maybe I will go ride my bike. Or. Maybe this is a sign that I should give up. I wonder if my bike will break also?

Made to Crave

Lord, I have felt so much like giving up lately. I don't really know why. Nothing has really happened of late. It's just a small voice asking me if all of this is really worth it. I know that it is worth it. I think I just feel like quite the failure sometimes. Not in 1 giant way. But in 1,000 little ones. This made to crave journey is so much harder then I would have ever imagined. I wonder if I can really even call it a made to crave journey any more! ;) I have allowed some sweets into my life. The crazy thing to me is that now is when I have started losing weight again. I am smart about what I eat. If I do eat something "bad" then I don't pig out on it anymore. And I make sure that I get my exercise in for that day. But, still that food that is not beneficial to me is what I choose to eat. If you have eaten the peanut butter M&M's then you know what I am talking about!! ;)

I have said from the beginning that this isn't about losing weight. That it's about craving God above all else. I desire to crave God above my craving for those wonderfully perfect M&M's. But I wonder if I have sort of deceived myself. You see. I do want to lose weight. I was stuck at 10 pounds for 4 weeks. 4 weeks and not a single pound lost. To say that I was frustrated is the understatement of the year!! I was eating right and exercising but NOT LOSING ANYTHING!! So finally under the advice of my wise friend....I pigged out 1 night. I didn't gorge myself. And by the end of the week I was down 2 pounds!! FINALLY!!

I say all that to say.....that, yes, I desire to know God. I want him to feed me with some real truth from his word. But I DO want to lose weight also. And somehow....somehow the 2 corelate.

I think I would do ok if it weren't for school. We start making lunch and the smell of the cookies or the brownies sends all my resolve out the window. That craving smacks me across the face and almost demands me to eat it.

I do have to wonder if that is how an addict feels about his drugs. It's almost something that you just have no control over. No power to stop. I feel almost powerless when it comes to these cravings.

But then God.......

Then God reminds me of the truth of his word.

I know a couple things about God.....

1. God always makes a way of escape.

2.This craving is not bigger then God.

3. God will not give me something that is bigger then I can handle.

1 Corin 10:13~There hath no temptation taken you but such as in common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

This verse is proof of all things truths to me.

Another thing I know is that God is the one who has kept me even TRYING to do this. If it were just me myself and I, I would probably be shoving fist fulls of M&M's into my mouth right about now. :0

So the truth of this journey is this.....

-yes, it is hard

-yes, I have cheated

-but I am still continuing toward this long term goal that I have.

-I haven't given up

-I still desire for God to be real in my life

-I still desire God to use my life for his glory and honor

-and God HAS made his power real in my life by just the meer fact that we are going on not quite 2 months of this and he alone has sustained me. Even when I have felt like giving up and felt like nothing was happening and it just plain wasn't worth it to me.

- I have lost 13 pounds!!

Psalm 73:2~But as for me, my feet were almost gone; my steps has well nigh slipped,

~ 73:26 My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

I have been reminded of a friend who is fighting some very real and very angry demons right now. I am sure that she is fighting some very real cravings in her life. Today, even more then I want the victory in my life over this "little, seemingly insignificant" demon of sugar. I beg you to give her the victory in her life. She is in a battle for her life. Pour your grace on her life Lord. Keep her safe. Show her your power today. Draw her to you in a very real and remarkable way. MAKE her to crave you more then anything else.

Made to Crave

Mark 8:34~ If anyone would come after me he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

"With Jesus, if we want to gain we must give up. If we want to be filled we must deny ourselves. If we want to truly get close to God, we'll have to distance ourselves from other things. If we want to conquer our cravings, we'll have to redirect them to God. God made us capable of craving so we'd have an unquenchable desire for more of Him and Him alone. Nothing changes until we make the choice to redirect our misguided cravings to the only one capable of satisfying them."

What amazing stuff right there. I truly want to be close to God. I. want. to. be. filled. Not with crappy food. But with Christ.

The story of the rich man is such a great lesson for us. The rich man goes to Jesus and says...hey, I have followed all the rules. I have done what I should and still felt like he was missing something. His soul was still longing for something. Something that just keeping rules and regulations will never fill. Jesus says that all he has to do is sell his possessions, give his money to the poor and follow him. But the rich man can't do that. "The rich man goes away sad b/c he won't give up the one thing that consumes him. He is so full with his riches he can't see how undernourished his soul is." Imagine Jesus looking through the crowd straight to the rich man's soul and saying.....I want you to give up the one thing that you crave more then me. Then come, follow me.

Piercing thought isn't it?

Suddenly Jesus isn't staring at the rich young man; He's also staring at me-the inside me. The part I can't cover up with excuses and makeup. God sees my heart, He sees what my desires and my cravings are. He sees what I place before him.

Maybe your looking at me and saying....good grief you tub of lard, your making such a big deal over food. Well.....for me it's food. But what is it for you? What is it that comes between you and God in your life? Where do you turn in times of heartache and sadness? Or in times or boredom? Is it shopping? Or alcohol? Or sex? Is it drugs? Is it tv? What is it? Maybe it's none of these. Ask God to open your eyes to what it is and He will show you.

He will say to you.....give up the one thing you crave more then me and then come follow me.

Don't judge me to harshly before you attempt to give something up.

I have not done well this week. Food wise, I guess I'm OK. I have stayed under my calories, but I feel myself compromising this week. I feel myself slipping back into the old ways that I thought.

I don't want to go back. I refuse to go back.

1 day this week, I ate a cheeseburger for lunch. I was making them for the school lunch. And it looked good. It smelled good. I just plain ol' WANTED it. I counted up the calories and realized that it really wasn't that bad of a choice. I had the calories to eat it and so I did. And I enjoyed every single delicious bite of it. ( I might have licked the plate if I were alone!! ;) )

But then that night as I was thinking over my day. I regretted that cheeseburger. I could have made a wiser choice for lunch. I could have chosen something else that would have filled me and not left me with a shameful feeling in the end.

I know that I need something bigger then myself to keep me going. I need a "spiritual want-to empowered by God himself" to push me forward.

Lord, I need you. I need you to fill me with yourself so you and I can deal with these cravings.I want to go deeper with you. I want more and more and more of YOU. Please remind me to eat beneficial food for me and not the food I want at that fleeting moment. Help me to remember that this journey is NOT about counting calories it's about being filled with you. I don't want to be so consumed with calorie counting that I forget to seek you.

"Day by Day, God will give me enough want-to, laced with enough strength to be satisfied be healthy choices."

I have really struggled this week with knowing what food is a hindrance to me and what is beneficial to me. I have a calorie counting app on my phone that helps keep me accountable to what I put in my mouth. I have found it easy to get wrapped up in how many calories I am consuming and have kinda forgotten about the real reason why I am doing this. I have gotten puffed up at the number of weight that I have lost and forgotten to look at the one who has given me the strength to even get through 1 day. In turn I have gotten discouraged b/c the scale did not move this week. It is so easy to get caught up in the numbers of the whole journey and not focus on the changes that are going on in my heart and mind.

I love this verse is Hosea 10:12~Sow for yourselves righteousness, reap the fruit of unfailing love and break up your unplowed ground: for it is time to seek the Lord.

That's quite a verse isn't it.

Today Lord, may I deny myself, my you break up my unplowed ground. It is time to seek you.
(words in italics are taken from the book Made to Crave)

What is your next choice?

Made To Crave

1 of the places that kinda holds a special place in my heart is Beef A Roo. I know. I know. Not a typical place of endearment. BUT....it's where Hunny and I dated. A lot. I would get the 3 piece chicken strip meal and only be able to eat 2 pieces so he would get the last piece of chicken. And he would get usually the ham N swiss combo.

Have I mentioned the fries over there at Beef A Roo? No, I haven't. They really should be listed under my blog post title...things I love. They are almost the perfect fry. You can smother them with cheese or just plain ketchup and salt, the way I prefer. Yes. Beef A Roo holds many memories for us. We used to go to the old fashioned one on the south side of town. I used to always play the song yellow polka dot bikini on the juke box. :)

Since Hunny has been back to working nights for the past couple weeks, I was able to take a lunch break last week and go to lunch with him. ( Thanks Doug!!)

I will admit that I was slightly worried about what I was going to eat for lunch. What I REALLY wanted was that 3 piece chicken strip meal with the golden french fries drizzled with ketchup and salt with a tall glass of ice cold Mt Dew. THAT'S what I really wanted.

But......

What I got was the southwest black bean salad with a giant glass of lemon water. And if you are wondering yes, I did eat the sour cream. But I didn't eat the fried shredded tortilla chips.

While Hunny was up getting the food I had a heart to heart with God. I told him that what I really wanted was fries and that I didn't really think it was necessary that I not be able to have them. I told him that while I chose that salad that I didn't even know if I would like, what I really needed was for him to fill me, for him to satisfy my hunger and not make me hungry for more.

It was hard. I have to admit it. There were many times I looked longingly at Hunny's fries and ice glass of Mt. Dew.

But my prayer was answered.

I left the table that day satisfied. I didn't NEED even 1 of Hunny's fries. I am very grateful that God gave me the victory that day.

If I did it. Then you can to.

What will your next choice be?

Made to Crave

This Made to Crave journey is so much harder then I ever thought it would be. People have commented to me that I am just not myself. They are wondering what is wrong with me. The truth is that I don't really feel "myself." My old self would...be stressed-eat a cookie.... get annoyed with a co-worker-eat a brownie....have a fight with my husband- soothe myself with a wonderful bubbly diet coke.....have no patience for your fighting children- ice cream will melt away the frustration.

Now, I still have those same triggers....annoying co-workers, fights with my husband, no patience for the kids. But my immediate....go to comfort has been taken away from me. It is hard, so hard to really rely on Christ during these moments. There isn't always this " A-Ha MOMENT" where Christ just takes away my cravings and makes me suddenly full of the spirit and has me jumping and shouting for joy. It's actually quite the opposite. I feel empty. I feel alone. I feel dissatisfied. I feel jipped because EVERYONE else can have whatever it is they want and I can't!!! I want to throw myself a pity party. I feel like if only I could eat just a B.I.T.E of that gooey chocolaty brownie my feelings would dissolve and everything would be made better. Everything would magically go away and my world would be made right once again.

I.

Am.

Unsettled.

I am not in my comfort zone of Christianity where I sort of know what to expect and sort of know what to do. This journey of craving Christ above all else has my emotions going crazy.

I honestly wonder if I am going through some sort of withdraw.

I do NOT want to quit this journey. I know that for once, I have given myself over completely to something. To a purpose bigger then myself. I have purposely put myself in a place of relying on something other then myself and food for what I need.

I have been discouraged this week. I will admit it. I have tried and tried and tried SO hard. I have not cheated. I have eaten only food that is necessary for my body. And the scale has went back up this week. It can be very discouraging. I will have to say that the mear fact that I have done so well is a victory in and of itself. So today, I will determine that no matter what the scale says, I will rejoice b/c with Christ's help, I am doing something.

I don't exactly know what Christ is doing in me. I know that b/c I do feel empty. B/c I do feel alone and dissatisfied, I have in turn yearned...craved for Christ this week. I have longed to meet with Him. I have begged Him to rid me of these cravings. I have had to rely on HIS strength to get me from 1 craving to the next. I have longed to hear his voice. And it's been with a deeper passion that I have ever known before.

There is a line to a song that I love...... The more of us we fill, the more that we become hollow.....the line has hit me so hard these past weeks. I can try and fill, fill, fill, with food that I don't need. I can sooth myself with everything else other then the thing that I most need and long for. And until I am filled with Christ nothing else will satisfy me. N.O.T.H.I.N.G.

Today, I refuse to quit. I refuse to fill myself with food not necessary for me. I refuse to allow satan victory in my life. I refuse to walk around defeated. I refuse to make my stomach my god. I refuse to let the numbers on the scale to define who I am. The number just weighs my body. My real worth is in my heart and soul. I will allow Christ to complete the work in me. I will walk in the spirit. I will allow Christ to be seen in me.

Today, if you see me and wonder if I'm not myself or what is wrong with me. I would have to say nothing. Christ is just working on me. He is chiseling away the flaws. He is healing past hurts in my life. (which is a whole nother blog post) He is forming me into his image.

I encourage you today to allow God to work in your heart. Let him chisel the rough edges. I can promise you that it won't be easy. I can promise you that you will feel like giving up. I will promise you that it just might one of the hardest things that you have ever done. But I will promise you that it will be worth it all in the end. I can promise you that you will see God in a whole new and wonderful way.

What will your next choice be? Will it be one that honors God or self?

Isaiah 43:18-19 Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See I am doing a new thing!....I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.

Made to CraVe

Never did I think that a simple little verse hidden in the book of Proverbs would play such an important part in my day.

Proverbs 4:25~Let your gaze look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you.

Never did I think that during the course of my day to follow would that verse be the one to keep me on track....

You see, I have a goal this year. My goal is to Crave God more then I crave food. I don't mean I'm not going to eat. But I am going to practice Self-control and when I crave.....whatever.....turtle cookies, concrete mixers, blessed sweet coke a cola, you name it, whatever I CrAve at that moment, I desire to replace Christ with that craving.

This particular day I was making corn dogs at school. Now corn dogs I can honestly say that I have never really CRAVED. I really could leave them. We don't normally buy them and have them around the house. But this day, I was hungry, I hadn't taken the time to stop and eat a proper breakfast, and once I started smelling that tantalizing corn dog. I wanted it. I desired it. I LONGED for it. All I could think about at that moment was taking just a bite, a teeny tiny bite of that wonderful corn dog.

I started out joking with people that they better stop me if I was going to start to eat it. But the more time that went on the more and more angry I got. I just wanted a bite. Everyone else could eat one. Even my helper who has to watch the carbs she eats was eating some. Why couldn't I just eat it.

I honestly started to feel like a crack addict going through withdrawal. I was shaky and CrAbBy!!!

But then God.....

Brought to my mind this simple little verse that he had instilled in my heart and soul in the quiet of my morning.

Let your gaze look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you.

Let my gaze look straight ahead to my goal. To the thing that I wanted more then the corn dog. I desired to know my God more. Fix my gaze directly before me. Don't be distracted by that corn dog, or bowl of mac and cheese that was calling my name that day also. Don't turn to the left or turn to the right. I want my focus to be solely before me to the God that is calling me for more then food.

So right then, instead of slathering that corn dog in ketchup and chowing it down, I stopped what I was doing a made my lunch of veggies. And they were WONDERFUL. They filled me up. I was satisfied with food that was convenient for me. I saved myself about 250 calories.

I am so thankful for the little verse. I still go back to it when I think of how bad I just hAvE to have whatever in that moment. But today, my gaze is fixed ahead.

Another verse that has been so helpful to me is...
1 Corinthians 6:12~Everything is permissible for me but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible for me but I will not be mastered by anything.

I am ALLOWED to eat whatever I want. No one is stopping me from eating anything. But just b/c I CAN eat something doesn't mean that I should. So while my friends tell me that just 1 bite of that cookie is ok, I really desire for now to stay away from it. And by the strength of God, and ONLY by the strength of God, I can say that I made it another day. Another day where I honored God with my choices.

I will say that I am SHOCKED with the choices I have made. If you knew me at all before you would be SHOCKED yourself to know that a major milestone was crossed this past weekend. I made it through the ladies meeting at church and only ate a salad and a sugar free dessert. I RESISTED Linda Whitfords most amazing delicious quite perfect in its wonderfulness homemade sugar cookies. It was hard. But I did it. I also didn't cheat while at our church fellowship the next day. Which is quite the feat if you have ever been to a baptist fellowship. We Baptist KNOW how to eat!!! I brought my own bag of veggies and cooked them up and ate a ginormous amount for lunch that day!! And the kicker for me was the super bowl party that I went to where they had my absolute MOST favorite......ruffles potato chips and french onion dip. You have no idea how many times I walked past that chip tray and just want to shove my face in and swallow the whole thing!! =) I have never used self-control like that before. Ever. I would have said that I couldn't do it.

But by the grace of God......... He gave me the strength to remain in him.

After all, remember the ultimate goal of this journey isn't about making me a smaller sized person but rather making me crave Jesus and his truths as the ultimate filler of my heart. We are to remain is his healthy perspective. Let His thoughts be our thoughts. Remain. Let His ways be our ways. Remain. Let His truths go to the depths of our hearts and produce good things in our lives. Remain. Approach this world full of incomplete people with the joy of Jesus. Remain. And see our skinny jeans as a fun reward, nothing more. Remain. And be led forth in peace b/c I have kept my happy tied only to Jesus. Remain.
~ taken from Made To Crave by Lysa Terkeurst

I am so thankful that God placed this book in my life. Seriously.....buy the book.

Made to Crave

Did anyone else follow the Made to Crave segments on Klove? I don't think that I have ever enjoyed a radio segment as much as I did those. I am not usually the kind of person who runs out and buys whatever anyone is selling. But I couldn't wait to get my hands on a copy of the book.


I have taken my time reading the book. There is SO much information in the book and I don't want to hurry through it and miss a little nugget of information. It has REALLY made a huge influence in how I think about the things that I crave.


Crave~have a craving, appetite or great desire for: Plead or ask for earnestly: to long for, yearn


What is it that you CrAvE in this life? What do you go to when you are celebrating something, or have a no good, rotten, very bad day? Where do you turn when your world is being turned upside down. Where do you go when you feel unloved or unwanted?


I know what it is for me.

What God wants is for us to CrAve him for then we crave anything else.


I desire to crave God more then I crave anything else. I want to place God 1st in my life above anything else.


So please tell me.....anyone else read this book? What has it meant to you. I am sure that my friends are sick of me talking about it. I think every day I want to tell something else that I have learned from it.