The Stain

So a while back.... when it was rainy and cool.. oh wait... it's still rainy and cool...

I was sitting on my bed one morning reading my bible study.

I had just gotten the perfect cup of steaming hot coffee. I had taken the time that morning to use my French Press which I am madly in love with. I used my delicious Berres Brothers highland grogg coffee.

And I was just getting comfortable....

When all of a sudden.....

SoMeHoW....

I spilled my steaming hot coffee all over me. all over my bed. all over my study book. all over my bible.

After I got it cleaned up, I sat back down and really couldn't even remember what had happened. It was like my hand lost all it's strength and just dropped the coffee.

I was a little upset bc I have permanent stains on my Bible. 

I was thinking about my stained Bible this morning as I was pondering over what I was recently involved in.

I was getting comfortable in a room with others when I said something about someone that I shouldn't have said. I didn't really mean to. It just came out without thinking.

I feel terrible about it.

I don't know really how to make amends.

I got to thinking about how our words once said, can never be taken back.

They are like my stained bible.

While I can try and clean up the mess.

The stain will always be there.

The stain on their reputations. Whether what I said was true or not. Their reputations are tarnished to the people I was talking to.

The stain on my reputation as a gossip.

 

What a lesson.

 

While I don't like the stain on my Bible. It is a good reminder. That sometimes. Things can't be made right..... like it had never happened.

 

It can be forgiven.

 

But sometimes the stain will be remembered.

The Beach

We - and when I say we - I mean 2 of my sisters and numerous children - spent a much needed day at the beach.

When I say beach - don't imagine a glorious ocean. Because I unfortunately don't live by the ocean.

When I say beach - don't be too impressed.

The "beach" had plenty of sand and sun and water. It wasn't crowded and we had a ton of fun.

^ that's what you should be jealous about. ;)

The weather has been less then impressive.

Raining for 4 days and then sunny for 1.

So we took advantage of the sunny day and loaded up and went.

We do have fun. This family of mine.

And just think  - there were 3 boys who were in the water at the time this picture was taken.

Do you like Emma's Barbie lips? Her Daddy might have a tattoo to match. Because that's how he rolls.

And what's a day at the beach without a little Pampered Chef swag?

Maybe I will get a tattoo of The Pampered Chef hat on my arm! ;)

 

We left when the beach closed. We were exhausted. Some of us ok I was sunburned. Again. You would think I would have learned from a week ago at the pool.

 

I might have fallen asleep that night at 9PM. I haven't been to bed that early in forever. ( I know you really wanted to know what time I really went to bed. ) File that under #thingsyouneedtoknow

 

We are spending today getting ready for a baby shower for my SIL. They had their 1st baby a couple weeks ago. How fun to have a new little cousin. Emma for sure is in baby heaven and has RE-named all her babies Audrey. I'm sure you can imagine why.

 

 

Lessons

Yes, I am still alive.

No, I don't want to look back and realize how long it's been since I posted. I will get depressed.

There are various reasons why I haven't posted in so long.

It's not for lack of things to say.

It's not for lack of incentive.

I have been in a place.... not a physical place... but a.... a place, that took me so far out of my comfort zone. Out of my element. That I think it took me a while to feel..... "normal," more like myself again.

I did what I thought I was supposed to do. Followed a path that seemed so perfect on the outside.

And I think I really was supposed to do it.

Because it taught me so much about who I am and about what I want.... or don't want.... out of this life.

It taught me a lot about God.

About how He really is with us each and every day.

About how He does care about us.

About how He does lead us and protect us against those who really want to harm us.

It taught me that sometimes.... people really aren't nice. That sometimes.... people seem so innocent, yet are wolves.... desperately trying to harm us.

It taught me to be stronger.

To stand up for myself.

To know how I want to be treated,

About how I want to treat others.

It taught me about.... INTEGRITY.

And CHARACTER ~ about doing what is right... when no one is looking.

It taught me that it is ok to walk away. That sometimes that's the best thing you can do.

It taught me that God knows my heart, and cares about me.

That he loves me desperately.

That He....always leads.

It taught me to trust him and follow... even when it just. doesn't. make. sense.

I am eternally GrAtEfUl for these lessons.

I can't say that I would walk through it again.

But on this side, I can see the reasons for it so much clearer.

I don't know what you are facing today.

But know that God has a reason for it.

He will turn ashes into beauty.

He will take what seems to be falling apart and hopeless and make it into something that will glorify and honor him. And you will be amazed.

You will see the absolute.... goodness.... of God. Because that is what he is.

God is just so wonderfully good.